Adults are human too

As we grow up, we start to realise that everybody is human, everybody is equal. People who we thought were all-knowing, the teachers, our parents, the adults of the world, seem so much less significant. We understand that they are nothing special anymore, that they are just as uncertain as we are, that there was never any safety net for us to fall onto even though we felt so secure with their decisions before.

When we were younger, their word was law. If a grown up told us that 2+2=5, then it must be true. We never resisted, they knew more than us. We succumbed, because we thought everything they said was correct.

As we grow up, we realise that the world is not painted in black and white. There is no right or wrong. A million shades of grey flash before our confused eyes every day, and nobody knows what to do about it. There are people who try to make sense of it all, to perhaps categorise the greys into darker and lighter, and eventually into black and white. But others, like me, believe that it just can't be done. grey is grey, no matter how you look at it...

But that's a scary thought. Adults aren't all knowing. So where does that leave us? We don't have anything to fall back on anymore. It's up to us to create our own morals, decisions. We can't turn to them to make our decisions for us anymore. They know as much as we do and, in certain cases, perhaps less. It certainly makes me feel extremely insecure in my decision making to know that even my parents aren't sure about what they want for me, about what I should have for myself.

Or sometimes, the flipside occurs and they make decisions for you that you don't want. You know that they've made a mistake, a common human error, since they're as human as you are... but they are adults. We are merely teenagers; they still hold power over us in this world. What then?

I always thought that my parents were pretty perfect. I always thought they had the perfect morals, their word was law, everything in the world was exactly as they said. But lately I think I'm realising that they are human too, and the corruptions of humanity affects them as well. ...Adults are no saints. Lately I realised just how much some of my parents ideals and morals go against my own. But what can I do? I'm just a kid in their eyes.

I won't complain about them. Whenever I do, people agree with me and I get pissed off because I think, what right do you have to critisize my parents? But then again I brought it upon myself I suppose. It seems like a lot of parents are this way though. Humans eh? I still love my parents. But that's why it bothers me so much... something that I can't control. Aaah I feel so useless.

It's a paradox, they want me to do something, but for all the wrong reasons... so do I do it? I want to do it too, but for myself, not for them. I don't want to do it so they can fulfill their reasons for wanting me to do it... but why would I sacrifice myself for them? Yet, if I do succeed, I'll be happy but at the same time it's cancelled out because they won as well. ...Looks like it's always gonna be lose-lose for us kids.

I guess we just have to wait our turn.