la la la...

ignoring how this is an obvious paradox, it's still cool :3

I realised that I am much better at expressing myself in writing than verbally. Maybe it's because in writing I have time to organise my thoughts before I 'say' them. Wow my brain must be so slow, can't even keep up with my mouth... Also I guess I've been too reliant on things like msn for too long, that I can't speak a proper coherent sentence in real life without taking a long time to organise the words, and even then my mouth manages to stutter or screw it up somehow... am I not used to speaking?

I guess, since I was young I've been pretty reclusive and introvertive. I was never good at talking to strangers. Surprising as it may seem it's true... I know now I seem pretty outgoing, don't have a problem with approaching new people etc and like making new friends, but it's taken a lot of growth to break out of my shell. And so even now I'm not used to speaking properly. Maybe it's because my English skills are going out the window. What am I supposed to do? English is my 1st language now, and if I can't even speak this fluently and effortlessly... @_@

So, I must practise speaking. Because it's not only english I fail at speaking, also chinese and french, the words just never seem to come out right, even though I have it all sorted in my head... just goes blank when I want to say something.

Am I a naturally introverted person trying too hard to be extroverted? Aaaa, who knows anymore >>