25 January 2012

The puzzles of our lives



We spend so much time trying to find that perfect puzzle piece that fits, searching for the perfect job, the perfect friend, the perfect degree to take in university, the perfect soulmate.

Our lives are like enormous incomplete jigsaw puzzles -- we constructed our straight edges from childhood; our parents taught us values, we learned how to walk, to speak, to listen and to act. We learned when to smile and when to cry, when to walk ahead and when to sit by. These are basic emotions and skills, picked up without our trying.

But as we grow up, we need to build inwards from this border -- things suddenly become complicated. Our sky is made of billions of shapes of the same hopeful blue, our earth millions of shades of brown and green. We dream so many dreams, of a better future, of a happy future -- there are so many ways to achieve it. Our present is full of different factors, our friends and family, our career, education... as we build and build and reach the horizon, how do we connect our future to our present, our dreams to our reality?

If we defined ourselves as a single individual puzzle piece, "me" -- where do we sit in that puzzle? Are we only concerned about our present situation and situated in the earthen browns? Or do we spend too much time with our head in the clouds and float amongst the blues?

Or, perhaps you are like me, stuck in that awkward, tenuous, fuzzy border between blue and brown. Perhaps you are looking for the next piece in your puzzle, to fit your grooves and protrusions. There are those myriad pieces that definitely don't fit -- perhaps the grooves are too small for your sticky-outy bit, or perhaps too large and you slip out of it too easily, disinterested. There are then those millions of pieces that look like they fit, but as you try to branch out from those, you realise you were mistaken; it might take a second, it might take years. A doctor who turns to acting, or a lawyer who turns to comedy. Who are we to know what the future will hold?

We could spend eons searching for that perfect piece that fits exactly where it should. Some people are lucky and get it right the first time, but for the majority, we just choose pieces that look like they fit. Many go back and change it later... For a puzzle with so many pieces, in a world so big, and where the pieces look so similar in appearance (is this shade aquamarine? or perhaps cerulean, turquoise, sky blue, cornflower blue, azure, maya blue, royal blue?? should I go into criminal law? or perhaps international law, property law, contract law, constitutional law, art law, civil law??) -- we could spend our entire lives paused and searching for that one piece, but how will we know when we have found it?

After all, how are we to know that a perfect piece that fits exists at all? In a puzzle this big, with all the colors of the visible spectrum and limitless opportunity in our world, we have the power to choose any piece we want and build our puzzles from there. Each of us can choose a fundamentally different puzzle to build; it is not like our lives are predestined to show one picture and one picture only -- if we do not like this red piece here, perhaps we will replace it with a magenta one, or even take a risk and exchange it with a lime green! There are so many pieces in the pack we have been given that there is no risk of ever running into that notorious missing piece!

Even in the end, when we try to look at the big picture of our lives, it is only ever partially complete. There are so many pieces to use that it is impossible to ever finish a full picture in with only 86400 seconds in a day. So, the real question is... with the time you do have, what kind of picture will you construct?

01 January 2012

新年快乐!! Baby you're a firework~

The Chinese word for fireworks, 烟花,means literally 'smoke flower'. Both visually stunning and ephemeral, 烟花 encapsulates the passing of time for new years -- we are reminded that like smoke, our time on earth is transient and yet, like flowers, it is beautiful and shouldn't be cast away. This is certainly something I reflected on as I watched the terrific fireworks show exploding off the Taipei 101 this new years.

It was the first time I've actually been to such a big event to celebrate new years. I remember the flying homemade lantern of 2010 done at jamies house, or the yelling out of apartment windows in Paris of 2011. All very small but sure ways to celebrate the coming of a new year. Fireworks are of course the more traditional way to celebrate new years and it's surprising even to me that this is the first time I have come into the new years with fireworks :)

New years day represents for me a cleansing, a way to start anew and take a look at where I am going, where I would like to end up by 365 days later (nevermind how this year is a leap year...). 2011 has been relatively good year; I feel like I learned a lot as a person and matured more as I got more used to the 'real world'.

How'd I do on my own flimsy goals tho? Which I never look at after making them...

1) Make this year much much better than 2010 -- I do think it was a better year than 2010 haha, so this was good~
2) Become more open :) -- no idea I think i was pretty open to begin with and may have gone backwards :/ but I'm not sure if that's a good or bad thing in many respects..
3) Do things I want to do, not things I feel obligated to do -- I tend to do this much to the annoyance of others because it is selfish. Lol can't win in this world...
4) Push boundaries -- yeah I guess I did go through with a lot of things I wasn't super into but the rewards were really good, I'm glad I pushed myself :)
5) Dedicate myself to the things I love 120% -- still haven't found something I love so much. At best I think I have committed 90% though.
6) Complain less -- not sure how this went. I don't keep track of my own complaining...
7) Get more fit. Because I didn't do it last year. ): -- better than 2010, still not that great though haha
8) Have more reasons to smile than frown :) -- definitely :D

Hmmmmm. Not bad I suppose. My way of thinking has changed a bit. New nyrs time~

1) do your best in uni. No slacking off even if other people say it's easy - get your grades first and then play around :)
2) if you are in America by the time you read this again, you are the man.
3) try new things - especially in uni, look for the things that might pique some genuine passion. Find the spark you lack.
4) GO AND FREAKING. WORK OUT YOU FAT SLOB.
5) get a job and earn some money :) becoming more independent even when support is there
6) be socially conscious
7) keep in touch with old friends
8) again -- have more reasons to smile than frown :)

I wish you all a very happy new years and an amazing year to come. Hopefully we are all still alive by January 1 2013 and the smoke of the 烟花 has not yet been extinguished by conspiracy theories coming true :p

Remember that every day is a gift we should be so thankful for because life is the single most valuable thing we each possess, and it's pricelessness makes every year an amazing experience -- make sure when you look back at the years of your life in nostalgia that each and every year is like a different colored explosion, and your life becomes a beautifully unforgettable fireworks show!